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Britain's Official Source for Alligator Enthusiasm

ALLIGATORS
.co.uk

The number one website about alligators in the entirety of the United Kingdom, possibly the world, definitely this postcode.

Yes, I Love Alligators
🐊 BREAKING: Local alligator refuses to pay council tax  •  🐊 Alligator spotted at Greggs asking about the vegan sausage roll  •  🐊 Scientists confirm alligators absolutely never skip leg day  •  🐊 Royal Mail unable to deliver parcel due to alligator in garden  •  🐊 Alligator given 5 stars on TripAdvisor for "efficient service"  •  🐊 Nation's alligators demand Bank Holiday  •  🐊 BREAKING: Local alligator refuses to pay council tax  •  🐊 Alligator spotted at Greggs asking about the vegan sausage roll  •  🐊 Scientists confirm alligators absolutely never skip leg day  •  🐊 Royal Mail unable to deliver parcel due to alligator in garden  • 

Absolutely True Facts

100% verified by scientists (who may themselves have been alligators)

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Phenomenal Teeth

Alligators grow up to 3,000 teeth in a lifetime. That's more than any dentist has ever had to deal with and frankly more than is polite.

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Extremely Chill (Literally)

Alligators are cold-blooded. This makes them excellent at remaining calm in traffic and catastrophically bad at keeping a flat warm.

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Surprisingly Sprightly

On land, alligators can run up to 35 km/h. This is faster than most of us manage on a Monday morning, and they don't even need coffee.

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Big Sleepers

Alligators can go months without eating by slowing their metabolism. Scientists call this "torpor." Regular people call this "working from home."

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Surprisingly Devoted Mums

Mother alligators guard their nests fiercely and carry babies in their mouths. The babies are reportedly fine with this arrangement.

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The Classic Float

Alligators can hold their breath underwater for up to an hour. They use this skill mostly to lurk, which is honestly very relatable.

80+ Million Years Existing
3,000 Teeth Per Lifetime
0 Alligators Paying Rent
10/10 Vibes Overall

Tips for Meeting an Alligator

Practical, official, totally sensible advice

1

Do not say "Hello mate, you alright?"

Alligators do not respond to casual British pleasantries and may interpret your friendly nod as a threat display. Remain neutral. Think of them as a colleague you've never formally met.

2

Do not offer them a biscuit

They will not be grateful. They will also not understand that Rich Tea biscuits are for dunking, not for biting hands. Leave your Digestives at home.

3

Give them the right of way

On paths, cycle lanes, and roundabouts. They were here first (literally — they predate humans by about 80 million years). Manners cost nothing.

4

Do not ask to pet them

They have said no. They continue to say no. They will always say no. This is their boundary and we respect it.

5

Compliment their scales

Results are unconfirmed but scientists believe alligators enjoy a genuine compliment. Try: "Your scutes are absolutely immaculate today." Then leave quickly.

The Official Quiz

How much do you really know about alligators?

🐊 An alligator approaches you on the pavement. What do you do?

What People Are Saying

Five stars. Every single one.

I came here expecting nothing and left knowing seventeen facts about alligator teeth. Changed my life. Changed my diet. I now eat slower and with more intention.

Margaret T. Retired librarian, Wolverhampton

My son asked me what an alligator was. I sent him to this website. He has since changed his career plan to "professional alligator spotter." This is entirely your fault.

Dave P. Very confused father, Leeds

Outstanding content. I particularly enjoyed the advice on complimenting their scales. I tried it at Bristol Zoo and I think the alligator nodded at me. Possibly.

Francesca W. Amateur herpetologist, Bristol

The ticker news at the top told me an alligator was refused entry to a Greggs. I have not stopped thinking about this for three days.

Terry O. Baker, Norwich

I am an alligator. I found this website to be mostly accurate, though I will say the bit about us not enjoying biscuits is controversial at best. Rich Teas are fine.

Gary 🐊 Alligator, The Fens

Used the tips section before a visit to Florida. Gave an alligator the right of way at a crossroads. We made eye contact. I felt understood for the first time in years.

Priya S. Holiday-maker and new alligator enthusiast